You’re Not Alone Feeling Lost is Normal
Written on: 6th Jul 2025
Yesterday, something magical happened. I hosted a community run + coffee meetup, and people showed up from across Ireland Galway, Swords, Dublin.
Hearing folks say my content or newsletter changed their lives? That was surreal.
It’s 8 AM as I write this Sunday morning, post-meetup, feeling insanely grateful. Got a big day ahead with a collab shoot lined up. And honestly, it’s hitting me how content helped me cross paths with people I once admired from a distance.
Yesterday was proof that I need to keep pushing.
So here’s a big announcement I’m launching a global community weekly online calls, guest sessions with experts from across domains (USA, Canada, Australia, etc.), and personalised help from me. Plus, quarterly meetups and retreats not just in Ireland but all across the world: UK, USA, Germany, Spain, and more.
Details and signup I’ll share next week. But just know: it’s happening. And I want you in.
This is where it began
Now let’s talk about navigating your 20s. This one’s for everyone who’s been feeling the weight of figuring it all out.
You’re Not Alone Feeling Lost is Normal
Even I feel it sometimes comparing myself to bigger creators, thinking they’ve figured it all out. It seems like they know exactly what business to start, how to market it, how to grow fast. But the truth is, even the biggest names out there feel lost and insecure at times.
In fact, the higher you go, the more intense those feelings can get. Everyone wears different hats depending on the setting. For example, when I’m in a therapy session, I’m open, vulnerable, and receptive to feedback. But when I’m on stage giving a talk like the one I did on personal branding I present my most confident, polished self.
This is how most people operate they switch roles depending on the space they’re in. And yet, we end up comparing ourselves to the most curated, filtered versions of others. Remember this everyone’s navigating something behind the scenes.
The Great Scattering
Until the age of 22, life feels like a clearly marked roadmap school leads to college, college leads to a job. Everyone around us is on the same path, the same timeline.
There’s a shared rhythm similar ages, similar stages.
And then suddenly, it all scatters. Friends relocate. Some get married. Some start businesses. Others dive into corporate careers or move abroad. There’s no single path anymore.
We start meeting people in completely different phases of life someone’s ten years into their profession, someone’s just getting started. And this disconnect between where we are and where others seem to be? It makes you feel like we’re falling behind.
Mel Robbins perfectly names this phenomenon The Great Scattering.
The fix? Anchor yourself back to your own timeline. Try the T1 + T2 framework I shared in one of my earlier letters to regain clarity and personal direction.
Paradox of Choice & Decision Paralysis
We’re drowning in options career paths, fitness routines, travel destinations, creative pursuits and it’s making everything harder, not easier.
Social media shows us 100 lives at once. One friend’s backpacking in Bali, another just secured venture funding, someone else is hitting insane PRs at the gym. It feels like everyone is doing everything except you.
This constant stream of stimulation triggers a psychological effect called decision fatigue. Your brain gets overwhelmed by too many paths, and instead of choosing one, it freezes. That “stuck” feeling? It’s not laziness it’s your nervous system short-circuiting from overstimulation.
There’s even a famous study called the “Jam Experiment” that proves this. In a grocery store, shoppers were offered two displays: one with 6 types of jam, the other with 24. Surprisingly, the display with fewer choices led to way more purchases. The takeaway? Too many options reduce clarity and action.
And here’s the thing our parents didn’t have to deal with this. Their exposure was limited. They compared themselves to their neighbors or relatives not to thousands of high-performing strangers online.
So when they say, “Why are you just lying around?” it’s not judgment it’s a generational gap in understanding how different our brains are wired now.
The fix to this, take a small action. Block the noise. Start with one task. That’s all it takes to break the loop and start building momentum again.
The Pressure to Do Everything Now
I often used to feel this intense pressure to do it all before we hit 30 start a business, fall in love, build a six-pack, travel the world, try skydiving, give a TED Talk. Why? Because deep down, I believed life will slow down or become too busy after a certain point.
But here’s the truth if we manage to tick off every dream or adventure in our twenties, what’s left for our 30s, 40s, or 50s? This unrealistic rush compresses everything into one decade, leaving no room to breathe, enjoy, or evolve.
Instead, create a lifetime bucket list. Spread things out. There’s no deadline to feel fulfilled.
And here’s the mindset shift that helps the most: ask yourself do I want this or do I need this? Most of our goals are “wants.” That awareness alone can reduce overwhelm and help you focus on what truly matters right now.
Pick up running I am telling you
3 Mental Shifts That Helped Me
1. You Don’t Have to Do Everything in Your 20s
This is just the start of your journey. Instead of stressing over ticking every box career, fitness, relationships, travel right now, try making a lifelong dream list. Your 20s are just chapter one, not the entire book.
2. There Are No Wrong Decisions—Only Lessons
I’ve lost thousands of euros in FnO trading. But that experience taught me it’s not for me. Every “mistake” is actually a valuable insight whether it’s freelancing, coaching, trading, or working in tech, all of it adds something to your growth. So stop chasing perfection. Just take the leap. Count 3… 2… 1… and go.
3. Focus on One Thing at a Time
You don’t need 10 goals to make progress. Choose one goal for the month—like hitting the gym 3 times a week and eating home-cooked meals. That’s enough. For your quarter, pick just one “main quest” and commit to it fully.
If you’re struggling to choose, here’s a simple one:
Run 10km per week, broken into 3 runs. Tag me or reply when you’ve done it. Let’s build momentum together.
Whenever you’re ready, here are some ways I can help you:
#1. Strategic Advisory call: Get on a 50-minute strategic advisory call with me to break through a current personal or career roadblock.
Gain a high-impact mental model to navigate your challenge with clarity and confidence. Reframe obstacles into leverage points that accelerate your growth. Walk away with a precise action plan that gets you moving without unnecessary friction.
#2 By far the best Podcast I have done, How to Land a Job in Economic Slowdown
See you next Sunday!